predictably...

...and yet I failed to predict it. Today I posted a couple of photos I took of baby L yesterday on FB. And got a host of (thankfully private) messages congratulating me on the birth of my daughter. Even though I had tagged my cousin on the photos. So now I have to reply to them all and say "actually...". My fault, I should have thought it through properly. I am an idiot!

mixed emotions

Yesterday afternoon my uncle died. He was my mother's brother and also my father's best friend. He used to call me (among other, more rude, names) his "other daughter". He had a good life with not a single day sick until 3 months ago when he was diagnosed with cancer. He died peacefully at home with his family and for that I am truly grateful. But it still hurts that he's gone.
But in the midst of it all we heard that my cousin from the other side of my family gave birth to her first baby last night. She's in the maternity unit of the hospital where I work and where I was for my pregnancy with Tilly. This morning I went to see them and I was the first person other than her parents to hold this new life. Less than 12 hours old and already baby L looks like her mother, which means she looks a little like me. Baby L's father is caucasian, like A, so I really had no trouble imagining what Tilly would have been like. In fact I've had trouble stopping.
I am beyond happy for my cousin. But I am so sad that my uncle has gone and that my daughter died before I could hold her and say "I am your mummy".
Today is 15th October:

summer reading 2012

I have been on a real crime and thriller kick this summer, with the Amazon daily deal for Kindle aiding and abetting my addiction.  Well, at 99p a book, it would be rude not to.  Since the beginning of June I've read 26 books; some good, some fair and some frankly hardly worth the space they took up.  As I don't want to lose your friendship, I've selected highlights to share rather than all of them :-)

June and July were taken over by chain-reading five Jo Nesbo books.  I read the first one - "The Redbreast" while I was in Oslo and was completely gripped.  The hero Harry Hole is flawed, to say the least, but nonetheless he's compelling. It's the third Harry Hole book, but the first to be available in English (although the first in the series, "The Bat", was published in English this week).  Even when I was back in London, I couldn't get enough of Harry and read "The Devil's Star", "The Redeemer", "Nemesis", and "The Snowman" in quick succession.

While in Italy last month I swapped one flawed hero for another, albeit slightly less flawed: Lee Child's Jack Reacher. Slightly more restrained, I have only read three of the series so far :-) "The Killing Floor", "Die Trying" and "Tripwire".

I did manage to read some non-crime books too, my favourite of which was "600 Hours of Edward".  This was brilliant: funny, moving, entralling.  Edward is in his late 30s, has Asperger's, obsessively records data and is slightly fixated on the old TV show "Dragnet".  His days follow a pattern until new neighbours move in across the road - I won't say any more in case you want to read it (and you should!).  And finally, "The Last Werewolf" by Glen Duncan.  I'm not usually a big reader of vampire / werewolf / Twilight-type but I read about this book on a books blog I follow and it sounded intruiging.  It's about a 200-year-old werewolf, the last of his kind.  He's tired of life and is welcoming death until something remarkable happens and everything changes.  Again, no spoilers in case you want to read it (and again, you should!)

Sicily

Twenty hours on a ferry from Genoa and we fetched up in Palermo. If you haven't been to Sicily, and even if you have, come as soon as you can. It's gorgeous. And Palermo is even more chaotic and crumbling and charming than Genoa. Mali, I'm looking at you in particular. Come here and fall in love for yourself!

Genoa

After a full day of travelling on three trains, we've fetched up here in Genoa. It's a mad, crazy, lively and distinctly edgy city. Just crossing the street is a bit of an adventure, as is playing dodge-the-street-hawker.
But it's wonderful! (Sorry no photos, am blogging on my phone)

three meals

Yesterday I had breakfast at St Pancras station in London.
Then I had lunch in Paris, in a little cafe close to the Gare du Lyon.
And dinner was in a side street in Zurich.
I'm travelling again :-)

"you are allowed to take care of yourself"

The above words were said to me over a year ago by Lovely Therapist, shortly after A left.  I feel rather ashamed of myself, but I applied those words to my Weekend of Double Whammy.  I couldn't get out of the Big Family Do, as it was held at my parents' place but I did sidle out of the couples-and-me lunch with friends.  I sort of lied - I said I had a migraine when in truth I only had an ordinary headache which would have gone away with a couple of over-the-counter painkillers.

Instead, I spent the day reading on the sofa, complete with my Darling Little Cat on my lap and endless cups of tea at my elbow.  And I have to say, I felt so much better equipped next day - which turned out to be extremely lovely and fun and full of food and noise and laughter.  My heavily pregnant cousin didn't come, which made the day easier for me, and the gods intervened and made my aunt not ask me about when I'm going to find someone new and did I want her to introduce me to so-and-so ("very nice man, darling, I was at school with his mother, divorced now of course and has two children, 10 and 13 I think").

And I came home with the remains of one of the desserts and a bottle of wine my mother pressed into my hands :-)