Today I did something I'm proud of: I kept it together.
A colleague came to my office and told me about his wife having her 20-week, anatomy scan on Friday. It all went well, the baby is a boy, his 2-year-old daughter is beside herself at being a big sister to a baby brother, he can't wait to have a son, here, Illanare, look at the scan photo.
And I did. And I exclaimed over it, congratulated him, asked all the right questions in a bright and interested voice, smiled and nodded at the answers and when he left I took a deep breath, turned back to my desk and carried on working.
For the first time since we lost Starchild, I had an other-people's-baby conversation and didn't have to run to the loo at the end of it and cry my eyes out. I held my sh1t together.
It won't seem like much in the fertile, non-loss world, but I am proud of me.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
oh illanare. well done.
ReplyDeletethat's pretty damned good.
It seems like a lot to me. I'm very impressed and think you deserve an award, or at least a huge hug.
ReplyDeleteThat is a serious milestone. I know how hard that was and I'm really impressed! Congratulations in a very bittersweet way.
ReplyDeleteGood job ... {{{HUGS}}}
ReplyDeleteI couldn't have done it. You're quite strong. :)
ReplyDeletePatting you on your back: Well done!!
ReplyDeleteYou SHOULD be proud of that effort!! I will look at pics and do the "looking interesting" thing but I fear my face betrays me at times as I'm sure it shows what my heart is feeling...
ReplyDelete*Applauds* you should be proud!!
xx
Well done petal. Not trivial at all, you did great.
ReplyDeleteI'd be proud too. Well done, brave girl.
ReplyDeleteWow, that is amazing. I get an actual knot in my stomach when those things happen to me. Very impressive.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your comments and support on my blog. I am sending love your way too.