It seems that I have, at work at least, turned into a sort of universal spinster aunt of yore. The man in the opposite office has two young children and every morning I am treated to the stories of how they slept, and how often he or his wife were woken in the night. Pregnant Doctor likes to use my office to have a quick 5-minute sit-down and rub of her belly while she tells me how difficult she is finding being pregnant. A friend's wife is recently (as in about 7 weeks) pregnant with twins and I have daily updates about her morning sickness and their worries about how to tell their 4-year-old son to expect siblings soon. And finally, Dr Old-School is going to become a first-time grandfather in a few months, and shows me his daughter-in-law's scan photos every time she has one (which is every few weeks as she is part of a research study).
I try, I really do try, to maintain my happy face each time. But I admit here, in this place of safety and understanding, that each day my heart breaks a tiny bit more.
Other's or Aunties' Day
8 hours ago
oh honey.
ReplyDeleteyou're a braver person than i. i have very little, to zero tolerance, for things [or people] that make my heart hurt anymore. if it means peoples feelings get hurt in the process, well so be it, my heart and it being intact and not hurting is more important.
i know it will be hard but if it start to hurt too much, please be brave and say something, i'm sure they will understand - remember no one is going to look out for you as well are YOU will.
love ya guts honey
~x~
Ugh. If it was just the one person, or one time, I could probably handle it, but it's that constant/steady bombardment of reminders that I don't have what comes to others so easily that I find so hard to handle. Sending you (((hugs))).
ReplyDeleteI bet it's stuff like this that made those old time spinsters cranky. I wish you didn't have to hold up the happy face that everyone expects. Damn society.
ReplyDeleteThat just plains sucks. I agree, if it gets to be too much for you then you must speak up and if their feelings get hurt so be it. You must take care of yourself and your heart. At my new job, I just missed about 10 teachers being pregnant this past year...I know that would have been so so tough on me had I been employed during that time. Big hugs.
ReplyDeleteI would have lost it by now if I were you. You deserve a big huge year-end bonus or at least a new mouth guard for all the teeth-grinding you have to do.
ReplyDeletelove, inB
Good grief, what on earth is wrong with these people? Can I PLEASE come and shout at them for you??
ReplyDeleteSelf-absorbed co-workers. I really think that most people are so wrapped up in their own lives that they don't stop to think about what might be going on in another person's life. Most are so excited to talk about themselves that they don't stop and think about what agony another person is going through. Thoughtless co-workers.
ReplyDelete... and this is why I try not to talk about J all the time, or complain about lack of sleep to anyone except close family. You never know what people's situations are :( *please* speak up for yourself xxx
ReplyDelete