A very good friend of mine is pregnant. While she is a good friend, she lives a very busy life out of London and we only see each other a few times a year, conducting our friendship mostly by email and phone. So when I heard that she was pregnant, once I ran through the usual infertile woman's gamut of emotions, I was left with the overwhelming feeling of relief that the chances are I won't see her until after the baby was born.
She's coming to London on Wednesday for a meeting at the university and wants to have lunch afterwards. I love my friend very much and I wish nothing but good things for her, her husband and her baby. And of course I said "yes" to lunch with every appearance of delight.
But she is now 5 months pregnant. And baby bumps still kick me in my stomach and push my insides up into my throat.
Other's or Aunties' Day
8 hours ago
ugh, ugh, ugh. My only hope is that she knows about your history and losses and will therefore be sensitive and not talk about babies/ pregnancy the entire visit. in my experience, while things things suck, the anticipation tends to feel worse.
ReplyDeleteyup i hear you. baby bumps kick me in the gut too - hence why i didn't meet up with Guvs mate while i was in england last year, his wife would have had a 5 month bump as well and i just didn't need to see that while on holiday!
ReplyDeletei hope the lunch goes smoothly and that there is no baby talk.
xxx
(O)
ReplyDeleteOh, sweetie, I totally get how hard this is. Your friend loves you and wants to see you. Period. If talk turns to pregnancy, just head it in another direction or excuse yourself to the restroom.
I actually think it's OK for you to cry off if you get to the day and it's too hard. And I say that as someone who's just been pregnant as well as someone who couldn't bear to see baby bumps. If you don't want to tell her why, there's always 'I'm having the most horrendously busy day' or 'I've got a stomach ache and I don't want to risk passing it on to you'.
ReplyDeleteHugs hon. I know it sucks. xxxxx
I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. So very difficult, I know. You have all kinds of permission to blow it off, you know!
ReplyDeleteDoes she know how you feel? Maybe if she does she'll keep the conversation away from her baby bump. I hope you can still enjoy your time with her. After all, all friendships should be cherished.
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